Tuesday, December 13, 2011

My Christmas Wish


I wish I could see my Mom and Dad this Christmas.

My father died in 2000. My mother in 2004.

And I was just thinking how nice it would be to see them again.

To come into their house on Christmas Eve, out of the cold into the warm. With my wife and kids beside me.

My Mom would come up in her apron and jingle bell necklace, glasses pushed up on her head, and kiss me. Well, to be honest, she’d probably kiss the kids and my wife first. After all, when you get married, you automatically get second billing. Then, when you have kids, all bets are off. You may not get that hello kiss until it’s time to say goodbye.

Then my Mom would bring us into the family room, with the fire going and the Christmas tree bursting with presents. The whole house would be filled with color and conversation, and music and light.

As my Mom would go off to get us punch, my Dad would wake from his nap.

He’d rise slowly from the couch, and give me a quick, rough kiss on the cheek.

Yes, I might just get that first kiss from my Dad.

The whole family would be there, too. My sister and brothers and their husband and wives. And my parents’ grandchildren and great grandchildren. Also some good friends.

We would eat, laugh, sing, play games, and open presents, and probably eat some more. Until later, when we’d walk the sugared up, almost sleeping, kids to the vans.

But just before we left, I’d stop to kiss my Mom and Dad, and hug them, a little longer.

Yes, it would be nice to see them again.

Actually, I just did.


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Copyright 2011, James R. Warda. All rights reserved.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Christmas songs that make you go "Hmmm...."


Four Christmas songs are stuck in my head.

Deep in my cerebral cortex, or whatever they call that squishy part in the middle.

Like “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.”

What exactly is the deal here? This kid comes down the stairs and sees Mom making out with Santa?

Are they not then scarred for life? Thinking that not only is Mom cheating on Dad, but she’s doing it with the man who is supposed to be one of the kindest people on Earth?

Then, there’s “Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer.”

I know I need to let it go. BUT I CAN’T.

First they mock him. Then they kick him out of their games. Then when times are tough, they come looking for him and beg for his help.

With friends like that…

Or how about “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year”? At one point, they’re sharing scary ghost stories. Ghost stories! That’s Halloween! Just about two months too late, guys.

And don’t even get me started on “We Wish You a Merry Christmas.”

A bunch of thugs invade my house on the premise of wishing me a happy holiday, then demand figgy pudding before they’ll go.

Well, first of all, I’ve never made figgy pudding. Wouldn’t even know where to start.

And, even if I did know how to make it, I wouldn’t. It sounds gross. Might as well call it lumpy pudding.

And, even if I did make it and did like it, why on Earth would I give it to you hooligans?

Now get out of my house before I throw a candy cane at you!

Quite a collection of songs, aren’t they? Infidelity, betrayal and blackmail.

Merry Christmas everyone!